Visiting Uncle Qi ‘s family in the winter break of school in Hunan Henyang in1980.
**此文的中文版在以下英文版之后紧跟。
My aunt Myrtle is my mother‘s sister-in-law. Throughout my childhood, my mother had frequently commented that my aunt was an extraordinary woman. When the National Party Government was about to collapse, my aunt had a chance to leave mainland of China with her parents to Taiwan, but she chose not to. In order to stay with my uncle, my aunt was willing to endure the predictable suffering from political persecution. This action was the manifestation of extraordinary strength, my mom said. To me, my aunt has been a heroic figure. After age 50, my aunt came to U.S., she studied and took the TOFEL exam, then the nurse licensing exams. She became a hospital nurse. To some of us here today, becoming a nurse may not seem like a big deal. But to those who were trained in the schools of mainland China during those years, it is a big deal, particularly in the field of medicine. In the era when the obsolete knowledge was all from the copycats of Russian textbooks, the trainings provided little help to handle those exams, not to mention the language barrier. My aunt’s spirit of braving her challenges has always inspired me, which was essential for me to become a US licensed pharmacist later.
For all those years, I had numerous opportunities to spend time with my aunt’s family, although each time was brief. We spent time together as early as 1967, and the last meeting was 2021. We met in Hunan Henyang, Guangxi Beihai of China, in New York, in Washington DC, in Gainesville of Florida, in San Francisco. Many times I felt that my aunt talked me just like one of her children. One year after my college graduation in1983, my aunt came and stayed with us in Beihai for a while. At that time, with help from Uncle Chan, Aisi, Aiyi and many other cousins had come to start school in US. I wanted to come to US to get a degree as well, but I did not see where the passage was. At the time, I worked in a pharmaceutical company. I told my aunt that the company recommended me as the chief executive and the Government was considering it. Upon hearing this, my aunt promptly made her comment, “what is the point of being the executive of a broken company? It is a useless quest. Don’t do it, Cici. ” Following this comment, my aunt firmly said “Go to the US to study. Aisi will help you (achieve that).” Three years later, when I was a graduate student, my aunt was leaving China for the US. Before her departure from Guangzhou, my aunt said to me again: “Go study in the US, don’t give up. Aisi will help you.” The promise made by my aunt was so potent, that it had energized me all the way. Having a $50 bill tucked in an envelope sent by Uncle Chou from Beijing, I had the registration fee for TOFEL exam and GRE. Aisi sent me his financial affidavit. Because of these helps, I am able to stand here to pay my homage to my aunt.
When my aunt was talking to me, I had always felt that my aunt addressed me like a parent. During my college years, I spent a school break with my uncle in Hunan Henyang. My aunt asked me questions about the courses in school, and there were moments when my aunt said very softly, but firmly to three of us, “Aisi, Aiyi, Cici, today we are going to read a book together. Each one of us read a passage in turn, does everyone agree?” The scholastic atmosphere was infused with parental love. In the year of 1989 around Christmas when I had just started the graduate school in the University of Florida: Aisi, Aiyi , Judy, Peter and my Aunt came to Disney World in Florida. My cousins took a route to Gainesville to see me. I was far away from my wife and son left in China, the loneliness was immense, the school courses were perplexing, and I felt miserably lost . All of these were obviously caught by my aunt’s eyes. All my cousins had finished schools, had jobs, owned houses, and were on their family vacation. I just started the school here, and I am the oldest. The contrast was huge. I profoundly doubted if I would be able to make it. My aunt was definitely able to look through me. She found a chance to pull me aside, said quietly “in a few years, you will be like them”. The encouragement from my aunt’s was powerful. Just a few words had spurred me all the way through later years.
When my mother moved from Washington DC to Florida to stay with me while recovering from her stroke, my aunt came from California to visit us. It was a holiday season of 2011. One day, my aunt was looking for a hair cap for a shower, but I didn’t even know what a shower cap was. My aunt said her criticism fast and straight “Cici, you should have a shower cap at home! “. Then later that day, my aunt asked me. “Cici, where is your whole body mirror?” But I did not have one in my house. My aunt had her straight forward shoot again: “what is wrong with your house?” Oh, my dear Aunt, I am so sorry. I used to think that as long as a mirror was big enough to cover our faces, alerting us to the overgrowing facial hair, then all would be good. Now I learned. In an evening, we decided to watch movie at home together. What movie to choose? My son Edward was quick, he said “Dad, you would like this movie, The Hateful Eight,” which is a bloody western movie with Samuel Jackson. Very quickly, my aunt gave her rejection “Oh, no! What kind of movie is this?!” My aunt called a halt, and she suggested we play “Pride and Prejudice”. My aunt had read the book, and watched movie of “Pride and Prejudice” several times. I wonder how many folks have my aunt’s ability to appreciate this piece of English literature. My aunt was capable of speaking out her opinion, almost spontaneously when she was among our family. I did not know how much effort she had to make to constrain herself from speaking out when she was in China. In 2017, my wife had been ill for years. I worked for a full-time job, and I took care of her when I was off work. My aunt was obviously worrying about my situation. She came to Gainesville with Aiyi to check on me. My aunt gave me various suggestions to deal with stresses. Before she left Gainesville, my aunt said to me: “Cici, from what I have seen, your house has been run orderly, your management of care has been carried out without chaos. You have done a good job.”
Now, my aunt, my last parental figure, has left me, left us. No one would come to check on me, no one would dare criticize me straight to the point, such as “what is wrong with your house?!” My vision is that, my aunt now is residing in God’s house, enjoying the bliss of reunion with the preceded ones she loves, watching over all of us. Aunt Myrtle, be easy, please, we shall be OK.
March 9, 2026
Baixi Lin
照片： 1980年寒假期间，在湖南衡阳探望舅父一家。
我的舅母 宋培萌Myrtle 是我母亲的弟媳。在我整个童年时期，母亲常说舅母是一位非凡的女性。当年国民党政府即将垮台之际，舅母本有机会随父母一同离开中国大陆前往台湾，但她选择了留下。为了能与我的林起舅父在一起，舅母甘愿承受当时可预见的政治迫害之苦。母亲说，这一举动彰显了一种非凡的精神力量。对我而言，舅母一直是一位英雄般的人物。五十岁之后，舅母来到美国；她刻苦研读并参加了托福（TOEFL）考试，随后又通过了护士执照考试，最终成为了一名医院护士。对于今天在座的某些人而言，成为一名护士或许算不上什么惊天动地的大事。但对于那些在那个年代接受中国大陆教育的人来说——尤其是在医学领域——这绝对是一项了不起的成就。在那个知识体系陈旧落后、教材全盘照搬自俄语译本的年代，当时的教育背景对于应付这些专业资格考试几乎毫无助益，更不必提横亘在面前的语言障碍了。舅母那种勇于直面挑战的精神始终激励着我，而正是这种精神，让我日后成为一名美国执照药剂师。
在那些漫长的岁月里，我有过数次机会与舅母一家共度时光，尽管每一次相聚都十分短暂。我最早见到舅母是1967年，而最后一次见面则是在2021年，在中国湖南衡阳、广西北海，以及美国的纽约、华盛顿特区、佛罗里达州的盖恩斯维尔和旧金山。很多时候，我都能真切地感受到，舅母待我就像对待她自己的儿女一样。1983年我大学毕业一年后，舅母来到广西北海，在我们家中住了一段时间。当时，在林趁舅父的协助下，Aisi、Aiyi 以及许多其他的表亲都已经远赴美国求学。我也渴望能去美国深造并获取学位，却苦于找不到通往彼岸的门径。那时的我，正供职于一家制药公司。我告诉舅母，公司推荐我出任厂长，政府方面也正在考虑这一任命。听闻此言，舅母立刻发表了她的看法：“去当一家烂摊子公司的负责人有什么意义？那不过是徒劳之举。别去，Cici。”紧接着，舅母坚定地说道：“去美国读书吧。Aisi 会帮你（实现这个目标）的。”三年后，当我已是一名研究生时，舅母正准备离开中国前往美国。在从广州启程前，舅母再次对我说：“去美国读书吧，别放弃。Aisi 会帮你的。” 舅母许下的这个承诺是如此充满力量，一路走来，它始终给予我巨大的精神动力。林超舅父从北京寄来的信封里夹着的那张50美元钞票，我有了托福（TOEFL）和GRE考试的报名费。Aisi 也给我寄来了他的经济担保书。正是因为有了这些帮助，我今天才能站在这里，向舅母表达我深深的敬意。
每当舅母与我交谈时，我总能感觉到她是以一种父母般的口吻在对我说话。大学期间的一个假期，我前往湖南衡阳林起舅父家探亲。舅母向我询问学校的课程情况；有时，她会用一种既轻柔又坚定的语气对我们三人说：“Aisi、Aiyi、Cici，今天我们要一起读书。咱们轮流朗读一段，大家觉得怎么样？”那种浓郁的求学氛围中，处处洋溢着父母般的慈爱。1989年圣诞节前后，我刚开始在佛罗里达大学攻读研究生学位。当时，Aisi、Aiyi、Judy、Peter 以及舅母一起来到了佛罗里达州的迪士尼乐园游玩。我的几位表亲特意绕道前往盖恩斯维尔（Gainesville）来看望我。那时我远隔重洋，妻子和幼子都留在中国，那种孤独感是如此强烈；加之学校的课程晦涩难懂，我感到自己彻底迷失了方向，内心充满了无助与凄凉。这一切，自然都尽收在舅母的眼底。我的那些表亲们早已完成了学业，有了体面的工作，置办了房产，正享受着阖家出游的快乐时光；而我虽然是他们之中年纪最大的，却才刚刚开始在这里的求学之路。这种反差，显得格外巨大。我曾深切怀疑自己是否能取得成功。我的舅母显然看透了我的彷徨。她找了个机会把我拉到一旁，轻声说道：“再过几年，你就会像他们一样。” 舅母的这番鼓励力量非凡。仅仅这寥寥数语，便激励着我一路坚持，走过了往后的漫长岁月。
母亲中风后，为了便于康复疗养，从华盛顿特区搬到了佛罗里达州与我同住；就在这段时期，舅母专程从加利福尼亚州赶来看望我们。那是2011年的节日季。有一天，舅母想找个洗澡用的浴帽，而我当时甚至都不知道“浴帽”究竟是个什么东西。舅母毫不客气地直言批评道：“Cici，你家里怎么能没有浴帽呢？！”那天晚些时候，舅母又问我：“Cici，你家里的全身镜在哪儿？”可我家根本就没有全身镜。舅母再次直截了当发问：“你这房子到底是怎么回事啊？”噢，亲爱的舅母，真是抱歉。我以前总觉得，只要镜子够大，能照清我们的脸庞, 能提醒我们脸上胡须长得太长了就好了。如今，我知道了。一天晚上，我们决定大家聚在家里看电影。选哪部片子好呢？我儿子爱德华反应很快，脱口而出：“爸，你肯定会喜欢这部电影——《八恶人》。”这是一部由塞缪尔·杰克逊主演的血腥西部片。放没几分钟这电影，我的舅母发声反对：“噢，不行！这是什么烂片啊？！”舅母叫停，提议我们播放《傲慢与偏见》。舅母不仅读过原著，还把《傲慢与偏见》的电影版反复看了好几遍。我想，这世上究竟有多少人能像舅母那样，可以领略这部英国文学名著的魅力呢？在家人面前，舅母总是能毫无顾忌、甚至近乎本能地直抒己见。我无法想象，当年文化大革命期间身在中国时，她究竟要费多大的力气才能克制住自己，不把心里话脱口而出。2017年，我的妻子已缠绵病榻多年。我当时有一份全职工作，下班后便回家照料她。舅母显然非常担心我的处境。于是，她带着Aiyi专程来到盖恩斯维尔探望我。舅母给了我许多建议，教我如何应对生活中的压力。临离开盖恩斯维尔前，舅母对我说：“Cici，依我看，你把家里打理得井井有条，照料G.L.的工作也安排得有条不紊，毫无混乱。你做得非常出色。”
如今，培眀舅母——这位我生命中最后一位长辈般的亲人——已经离我而去，离开了我们大家。今后，再也不会有人特意跑来探望我了；再也不会有人敢像她那样直言不讳地批评我，比如质问我：“你这家里到底是怎么搞的？！”在我心中，舅母此刻正安居于上帝的殿堂，尽享与那些已故挚亲重逢的极乐，并默默地看守着我们所有人。Myrtle舅母，请您安心吧，我们大家都会好好的。
Written on 2026年3月9日
Rose Hill Memorial Chpel, Whittier, California. March 21,2026
PurenHealthInfo.com 